It seems everyone today is talking about going ‘fearless’. Is there such a thing as being FEARLESS? Of course there is not. In fact, having some fear is a good thing! It’s when the fear paralyzes us or keeps us stuck that we need to find ways to Fear LESS.
We have 2 types of fear basically. There are the fears that are hardwired (those survivDal fears, which trigger your fight or flight response) and we have belief fears (those are the ones based upon our experiences in the past or our assumptions about the future).
So how do you exercise those LESS fear muscles? Here are some tips:
1. First, make sure it’s a fear you want to get control of. Let’s take a fear of heights (one of my personal favorites!), make sure that you are the one who really wants to get past the fear, not because your mind (or someone else) is telling you to ‘get over it’.
2. Look at the fear head on. Often we look at the fear out of the corner of our eye, rather than face it square in the face and challenge it.
3. Drill down on what belief is causing the fear. I had a real fear of flying (it’s better, but not totally gone), and what I discovered is that for me, at the core, it’s a control issue. I don’t feel in control and that makes me afraid. So what do I do? I now try to fly every chance I get! Am I FEARLESS…no; but I fear LESS.
4. Reframe it. Most of us would admit to a degree of fearing failure. This is based on our past experiences and feelings. What if we reframed those ‘failures’ as learning opportunities? Yeah, that didn’t turn out the way I wanted, but what do I now know for the next time? THAT is powerful!
5. Celebrate (I’m all about celebrating!) your past successes. Think of the times that you did something despite your fear and the great results you got.
How do you move past your fears?