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Twenty One Life Lessons

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Twenty-one.  The magical year of adulthood and endless possibilities.  Of owning the world and living fearlessly.

on this day 21 years ago, a fuzzy little peach of a baby was born.

She came into this world under great stress and uncertainty; but when I finally got to hold her 3 days after she was born, I fell deeply and hopelessly in love.

This middle child has at times been the bane of my existence and also the light of my life.  She is the only daughter and the only envelope pusher of all 3 children.

She is: quirky, sweet, naïve, annoying, kind, independent, cranky, impulsive, funny, creative, argumentative, generous, inquisitive, a drama queen, resilient…she is unabashedly herself.

On this milestone birthday dear Daughter, I am passing on some life lessons that I wish I would have known at 21…love, mom

  1. If you play the Blame Game you will never win; (wo)man up
  2. It’s exhausting trying to be something you’re not
  3. It is not someone else’s job to make you happy…only you can do that
  4. Simplicity really is best
  5. This too, shall pass
  6. Time does not heal all wounds, but creates scars of experience and wisdom
  7. Life is so much better when you accept 100% responsibility for it
  8. Change yourself instead of trying to change others
  9. When in doubt, one small action starts the process of clarity
  10. Life is not fair…deal
  11. Forgiveness isn’t about freeing the other person…it’s about freeing you
  12. Girlfriends are one of life’s greatest joys
  13. Being happy trumps being right…every time
  14. There is no such thing as “I didn’t have a choice”.  You do
  15. Plan the work, work the plan
  16. Laughter really is the best medicine
  17. You can have anything you want in life…you just have to know what it is that you really want
  18. Surround yourself with those who refuse to let you be anything but your best
  19. You are imperfectly perfect
  20. Be grateful
  21. The best is yet to come

 

Dear Daughter

Wishing you a happy birthday and most importantly, a happy life.

xo

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Comments

  1. Carol Deckert says

    September 8, 2011 at 5:40 pm

    Danielle, Happy Birthday to your daughter. Hope she is aware of what a wonderful mother you are – and a good friend. Your “21” list is amazing! Enjoy!

    Reply
    • Danielle says

      September 8, 2011 at 5:59 pm

      awww thank you Carol, that is so kind of you 🙂 you’re pretty spectacular yourself.

      I will definitely pass on the birthday wishes

      Warmly,
      Danielle

      Reply
  2. Thelma says

    September 8, 2011 at 7:17 pm

    Tears!!!! What a beautiful tribute to a beautiful young lady and as always you are One Smart Cookie! Great advice, all of them so very true….especially #12! xoxo’s to you both and another round of Happy Birthday Dear Briene!

    Reply
    • Danielle says

      September 8, 2011 at 11:03 pm

      Thank you dearest friend…

      I especially like #12 myself 😉

      xo

      Danielle

      Reply
  3. Debbie Saviano says

    September 8, 2011 at 7:47 pm

    What a beautiful Birthday List! As a grandmother of 5 ( I am much younger than that sounds) 🙂
    As a former educator I try to look at all of Life’s Lessons we get each day. This was one 🙂
    This owning I reread the Poem ; The Dash and this is a perfect place to share. The little dash between our year born and the one when we die is the Dash and it is so important to make those years Special in each and every way!
    Happy Birthday to your daughter and remind her to make the most of those “dash years”……hugs Debbie

    Reply
    • Danielle says

      September 8, 2011 at 11:01 pm

      Debbie…I bet you are a smokin’ gramma both inside and out 😉 I think that that is definitely a characteristic of educators…I feel like I became much more aware of life when I became one too.

      I’ve heard of The Dash too and I love that you shared it here…how perfectly aropos.

      Thank you so much for stopping by…and I’ll be sure to pass along the birthday wishes

      Warmly,
      Danielle

      Reply
  4. Jayne Kopp says

    September 8, 2011 at 10:32 pm

    Danielle, how lovely! Don’t know why, but I could have had a good sniffle as it was very touching.

    Nine years ago, I wouldn’t have appreciated this “quite” as much, but since I now have my own children…(both surprises at a later age 🙂 ) things like this just touch me.

    I have something I’d like to share with you that you might save for another time. I blogged about it a while back and people just loved it. It can be found here: http://jaynekopp.com/2011/07/22/wear-sunscreen-and-other-advice-for-life/

    Feel free to delete the ‘link’ if it was out of place to share it on your blog. I just thought you might like it.

    (that’s another one that get’s me going!).

    Happy Birthday to your baby. You’re obviously a lovely mom.

    best

    Jayne

    Reply
    • Danielle says

      September 8, 2011 at 10:55 pm

      Hi Jane,

      Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting…I am so very glad that you enjoyed the post. Of course I don’t think at 21 I would have appreciated it as much myself, but I kinda wish someone had shown me something like this then 😉

      Oh my goodness, thank you so much for sharing your post! I love, love when friends share in this space and I am delighted to pass on any wisdom 🙂 LOVE your sunscreen post; it gave me a chuckle and I’m most appreciative of you sharing it!

      Thank you for the birthday wishes…I will be sure to pass them on.

      Warmly,
      Danielle

      Reply
  5. Lori Paquette says

    September 9, 2011 at 11:19 am

    What a beautiful and moving tribute, Danielle! I want to share that as I hit “print” to tuck these into my journal, I envisioned these 21 Life Lessons as a info/postergraphic/manifesto (failing to come up with sassy name for it) that your readers can download and keep as a reminder. 🙂

    Please wish your daughter a very happy birthday! Celebrate.

    So looking forward to hugging you in person soon.

    Reply
    • Danielle says

      September 9, 2011 at 11:38 am

      Thank you Lori 🙂 You know I actually wrote a manifesto called The Good Life Recipe…to be shared soon 😉

      I shall pass on the birthday wishes and am so looking forward to getting that hug in person!

      xo
      Danielle

      Reply
  6. Doug Durham says

    September 9, 2011 at 4:15 pm

    Thanks for sharing such personal stuff. i read your post on Linkedin so I thought I would join in. You have a nice way of writing, keep up the good work. Let’s keep in touch. my blog is http://www.lifecoachdoug.blogspot.com & my web site is http://www.lifecoachdoug.com
    I look forward to getting to know you.

    Life Coach Doug

    Reply
    • Danielle says

      September 12, 2011 at 2:31 pm

      Hi Doug,

      So kind of you to say and thank you so much for jumping in 😉

      Looking forward to getting to connecting with you

      Warmly,
      Danielle

      Reply
  7. Crystal Sharp says

    September 12, 2011 at 6:53 am

    My website is called iboostmylife. And having such a lovely daughter is certainly a boost to your life.

    Reply
    • Danielle says

      September 12, 2011 at 2:30 pm

      yes indeed it is Crystal…

      thanks so much for stopping by 🙂

      Warmly,

      Danielle

      Reply
  8. Michael says

    September 16, 2011 at 2:31 pm

    Hi Danielle,

    Some great advice there, would life be better if we could play out our lives with the benefit of hindsight?
    Or is half the fun in not knowing what might be round the corner?

    One thing I wish someone had told me when I was 21:

    “How will you know if you never try?”

    Reply
    • Danielle says

      September 16, 2011 at 6:17 pm

      Hi Michael,

      Thank you so much much for stopping by 🙂 I think I agree with the “or” part of your comment. Most of the life lessons I think are things we must experience for ourselves to truly have them stick; however it was fun to pass on some of what I have learned and maybe, just maybe, I’ve given the girl a bit of 20/20 vision 😉

      I love your life lesson…I know that one took me a long time to learn…and I’m loving the ‘trying’ part now!

      Thanks so much for being a part of the conversation

      Warmly,
      Danielle

      Reply
  9. Robin says

    October 14, 2011 at 12:03 am

    Hi Danielle,
    It amazing that when we reflect on our young adulthood that we realize that we didn’t know as much as we thought we did. Your message to your daughter on her special day was packed with power. Thanks for sharing this with the rest of us.

    Take Care,
    Robin

    Reply
    • Danielle says

      October 14, 2011 at 4:18 pm

      Hi Robin,

      Thank you so much for stopping by 🙂 Not having a relationship with my biological mother has certainly influenced and impacted my relationship with my daughter. I just want her to be happy in her life and not have regrets!

      I’m so glad you enjoyed the post and I so appreciate you taking the time to add such a lovely comment.

      Don’t be a stranger 🙂

      Warmly,
      Danielle

      Reply

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